Zach is filled with poetic nonsense...

its been a super long time since ive been on here. maybe for good reason. maybe ive found better things to occupy my time. not really. i still want people to send me noodz. and i still love shows.

i read all my entries from a year ago. it brought back a lot of memories. and it made me think of the good old days.

i miss it.
i hate jesus.

well. gorilla biscuits was probably the best show of my life. it was super fun. i lost my shoe at one point and Civ held it up and said "who lost their shitty Vans? they dont want them back again." i laughed and yelled MY SHOE!!!!! it was bad ass. then everyone got on stage during Start Today. it was bad ass. stage diving is a new fav. we then crashed at bens house and watched suburbia. then we hung out today. it was an all around good time.

well. lately ive just been overwhelmed with the end of summer. and the lack of nudes. kinda bums me out. now that i realize that if i like someone. most likely they will have no interest in me and move on to the next person. so ill just jump around like crazy and run into people at shows. speaking of which i need a circle pit. now. ive seen to much hardcore dancing. i need to run around in circles with 20 other people also swirling around in chaotic harmony. just like the old days. back when the Flag was Black. the Circle Jerked. and everyone had fun venting their anger at a fucked up world all together. back when it was true. not the same breakdown after breakdown. and when no one moves around to the opening bands. back when security didnt give a fuck about stage diving or crowd surfing. and how the audience flooded with the masses of scrawny kids that just wanted to have fun and thrash to some fast music. back when it was true. and yet. tonight i had my chance to do just that. but the world has shoved itself up my ass. and has taken my money away. what the fuck.

send noodz.

well. lets start where i left off nearly a month ago. i apologize to anyone that takes interest in reading what i have to write. but anyways yesterday was rather eventful. i drove my recently acquired van to nicks house for a bbq. we went swimming and i sat at my waterfall near the pond and had a great time just sitting there waiting for something to happen. i need more of those these days. and skipping over a lot of stuff. people got drunk. a lot of drama happened. i couldnt sleep. so i spent the night comforting chris who was in bad shape. i kinda felt left out. not as being included as the whole group but in my head i was because most people have paired off. all in fact besides a few exceptions. but anyways it was a good day and has been a good month. sorry i dont want to type more. im a failure.

well. i painted my garage today, and like usual. brack came over and helped me clean the lines. but anyways im kinda in the mood where i wanna pass out. not because of anything really, just that im bored, overwhelmed, and apathetic. i have a lot on my mind, i have a lot to do, and i have no motivation to do any of it. i havent talked to some friends that i really want to hang out with. so im going to most likely do nothing about it. so, my love life is nonexistant. and i have no job, and im hopefully getting one soon. my license and van are on the way. and i just want someone to hold onto, no matter how corny that sounds. i really need to go to bed and call the manager at safeway. i really want to become a political assassin, but i have no motivation to carry it out. im saying random things off the top of my head. grip thumb needs more shows, and i need lyrics for more songs. but i want to be really informed about i write about, im trying to become a better writer so i guess that would help.

i want.
i need.
a girlfriend.
or.
at best.
someone to love.
or.
at least.
someone to be with.
whenever i need.



fuck.

well. not too many people have been saying anything about my thoughts and what not so... i think that im just going to give you a brief summary of my day.

-band practice
-lurkage at 303
-bombed hill o' death
-at shit twice on hill o' death
-got slighly severe road rash
-broke phone
-broke deck
-recieved new deck from darren
-skated
-sat at home drinking tasty fruit drink with The Faction for a long time
-going to cover Lets Go Get Cokes
-going to shower
-going to sleep

(previous 3 are going to be after i download some music)

night. and thanks for not reading what i type its sweet.
guilt trip?
naw.

well. today was alright i guess. nothing too interesting. but there is something that is happening in my head. im not motivated to do much of anything. i just want to waste away or see something new. thats all. but thats not happening to im not content with my surroundings. my relationship status, is slowly fading into oblivion. as in i have lost the interest in anyone that i was once interested in. so im going to give up on it because i dont have the motivation to create something from beyond nothing. theres no point. tomorrow im going to get 2 applications for jobs. king soopers and safeway. its lame, both of those jobs seem super lame to me, but it will get me my van. so im willing to suffer and not be lazy and get a job.

i have horrible grammar.

i need to write new lyrics for Grip Thumb songs. i think the next one is going to be about starving people in africa. and how since they have nothing else they reproduce, and bear children into a horrible state of supreme suffering. that leads me to think that sex much feel way better when you are in a starving state. i might have to figure this out. but im lame so im not going to get laid anytime soon. so ill stop being immature and stop talking about it.

i have no idea what im going to do with my life.

maybe i should become a politcal assassin. like lee harvey oswald. then i could cause the nation to spiral into confusion about a small grassy knoll and cover up. you never know. thats maybe how i will become famous. and i hope some form of authority reads this. so i can be put on high alert status by the FBI, CIA, and the catholic church. come get me you bastards.

well. to all that want to know i recently just shaved my pubes. so they kinda itch a little. and my mom is yelling at me to get into the shower, and i dont really want to right now. so its a possibility ill have some better things to say after i return from the shower. but at the moment your just going to hear all of my immature statements that have resulted from the past couple of days. last night i couldnt sleep, so i stayed up watching bad santa and girls gone wild commercials on comedy central. and frankly all of their advertising made me want to turn 18 at that second and order it. i guess you could say my teenaged hormones are in flux or something or another. in laymans (sp?) terms, well... you know what im going to say so there is no need to elaborate on the subject.

(im showering right now)

well. now that i think of it. i dont have anything really cool to say today. because today was kinda bland and awkward in someways. such as that it was fathers day. sounds like a simple holiday to enjoy right? nope. its always super awkward with my dad. he never seems satisfied with what we get him, and he always looks dissappointed. what should i do to please the man! i give him a whole day to him. and i end up feeling awkard in the end. and thinking that when my mom moves i have to live with him for the longest time. sweeeeet. sike. i dont know what to do there. and some other aspects of my life are yet to be unanswered. how am i going to get a good girlfriend that likes me for me, not anything else? when am i going to get a damn job? when are gas prices going to be $15 a gallon? when is nuclear war going to be declared? when is all human existence on this planet going to be destroyed because of our faults? when am i going to get laid? fuck i dont kno. now 4 people read this nonsense. tell me what you think.

well. sadly i dont have a gigantic boner as of now. cause dylan left. sike. we tried to write on his face last night, unsuccessful for the most part. the show was amazing last night. i really enjoyed Disease Called Human. probably my favorite band on the bill besides clusterfux. but, i dont want to type any longer because of the difficulty to type on bens keyboard. ill update a bit later.

to those 3 people that read this, thanks for wasting your time.

i do. ive had a great week, but i feel like i havent been skating enough. you never know. maybe on saturday i might step on and push some serious wood. i have been thinking a lot, and ive been getting really close with a lot of new people and im really excited about it, and i hope i can keep it up.

the following is a lame ass poem that im making up off the top of my head:

my thoughts roam as my eyelids plunder,
down beyond the depths of hell
where i should turn evil.
but the tug of my thoughts explode
out into the open.
they keep my mind fresh
from the rot and ruin of a decaying world.
and as my beliefs become more and more
outlandish.
i become more and more grounded, like the
trees in the earth,
and the paper weight on the desk.
but no matter how much i think, how much i tug.
im a slave to thought, and all that could be thought.
and this should make sense, if you thought what i do.
but you dont.
so ill keep it away from you.

well. today was good. i slept in until 1 to arise to the constant growl of a vacuum. and my brother giving orders out to his friends in order to clean the house. so i put on some music and thought little of it. then i called jordan up to go downtown again, 3rd time in 3 days, im on a role. we walked to the bus stop which was about a 20 minute walk. then the bus ride was agonizing and frustrating, the road was blocked and we didnt make it to wax trax for about 45 minutes. there i bought my first record, limited edition red vinyl of Exhumed's Anatomy is Destiny, im stoked on it. we then went to 16th and ate taco bell and met up with katie, hannah, nick, hermy and salvador. a notable moment was when some of these christan missionary fucks came up and tried to "talk" to us about religion. salvador told him that he didnt believe it cuz its bullshit. then the bus came and we went home. another beautiful day in denver.

salvador is a cool kid. like the rest of everyone. katie is still cool and nicks a dumbass. enough said. i dig them all.

time for bed. today was awesome, its early, and im most likely returning downtown after i wake up with my friend jordan. night.

well. i guess i should start off by making my first entry poetic and deep to make people read it more often with enthusiasm, so i guess this is an advertisement of sorts. so the day began with dylan, ben, and i rising at the early hour of noon, and some change. my neck was kinked, due to me sleeping on the crotch of a stuffed gorilla. we then lingered in the dim basement for what seemed an eternity, trying to wake eachother up with horrible groggy humor. our stomachs growled as our eyes drooped low with the late night endeavours of Tragedy, beer, and a slight drop in our hearing abilities: note the previous sentence only applies to dylan and i mainly, ben was absent from the show. anyways we scavenged clothes and the energy to climb the dozen or so green stairs that exposed us to light, and the need for food. dylan eventually embarked on getting cereal and milk. as his quest was being fulfilled, ben and i sat down and found pleasure in exploring the errors of his computer, and the relaxation and addiction to his balance board. dylan returned a short time later with frosted flakes, a gallon of homogenized milk, and a surprise of chocolate donuts. skipping many details, we then procastinated on riding the bus to my house for a good 5 hours, approx., and dylan departed, and only ben and i remained, we continued to waste the day away with computerized nonsense and relaxation, it was great. ben is becoming one of my good friends, maybe its cause hes intelligent and cool to be around, or its cause he meows to his cat constantly. well anyways, we became aware that wax trax got a new shipment of oldschool punk and hardcore vinyl, so we decided that we should check it out, but this flame of excitement was doused when his mom arrived to pick us up later than expected and wax trax was closed, so we just tagged along with bens mom and boyfriend, bill, and went down to 16th street mall. i was amused as i observed what was around me. a messy floor of a car, bens face trying to avoid sunlight, his moms assortment of hair clips in her hair, bills hand gestures out the car and his affiliation with eastside with coinsided with the NWA that was vibrating out of the speakers and filled our ears. we then got out of the car and put the money into the parking meter and then walked towards the mall. i stepped on the back of bills sandal, which caused me to feel very awkward and apoligetic. we strolled down the mall, ben got some new earrings and later on painfully inserted them into his ears. as we finished about our second lap i believe we came across a situation with the police and "the guys in yellow". i was intrigued by the circumstances and wanted to know more, but refrained as we continued to walk. as a side note, 16th street mall is very awkward for me. will all the hollow stares of people ive never seen. the hints of conversation which im paranoid, yet apathetic to its relevance to me. the decay of society around me, as republicans try to restrict generosity by posting signs telling people not to support panhandling, which contrary to the posters eventually supports our economy, things are falling apart all around me and are being rebuild newer, faster, more efficient, i hope culture survives. ben was very excited at this point in our "adventure". he saw some people standing at the corner of a street and recognized them as some local slam poets, so i followed him over after he sprinted off to sneak up on his mother and pretend to hold a gun to her head, amusing me unintentionally. as we lurked over on what was going on, i started to feel uneasy. not because the things that they were doing and saying were repulsive, but on the contrary were very inviting with the wit used and the power that they were portrayed. three of them caught my attention almost immediately. they began poetically spilling out their hearts about freedom, ironically to me four squad cars were parked not too far away. the three that were using the english language in the most beautiful from ive seen were a smaller white man with a red beard and thick black glasses, which were slightly squewed off to the side, a beautiful black woman that sang in the midst of the poem adding a beautiful atmosphere to the performance, and most notably this moderately tall black man which spoke with so much enthusiasm and persuasion i was uncomfortable in his vibrant presence. his words flowed powerfully and beautifully out of his mouth and through the small gap in this lower teeth. this display of pure human emotion and truth captivated me as i observed the walkers of the malls reaction to their presence. the majority of them were apathetic to the beauty of their words, and i even recall a bastardly fellow telling them to "shut up" at that moment i wanted to shove my foot up his ass, but i was again distracted by the trios powerful words and playfulness as i realized i had missed most of a different mans performance, i noticed his tattoo that spiraled around his arm though, it was a musical bar or whatever youd like to call it. again the powerful words of truth gushed out of the trios mouths in the form of the phrase "americas business is war". as ben and i proceded on the mall ride away from the poets and too the bus stop, i gazed out the window, watching all the men in suits and the homeless peoples faces as then i lost my fear of 16th, because in a sense its a place for all people to be around eachother, the homeless, the yuppies, the slime and the silk, its all there. i appreciate that. my mother was angry at me however, i was supposed to be home at 4, it was on the brink of half past 8, my ass was roasted but my mom doesnt stay mad at me for longer than about minutes. so we boarded the bus and marched down the aisle to the far back, and we chatted about our plans for road trips and our future automobiles. fantasy, that could be...should be realized. we then walked to bens house to pick up his friends jenny and zach i believe. and to make this short, for ive run out of poetic language to decorate my seemingly boring day with, i dragged them along with me on the bus to comfort my fear of riding the bus alone at night. so i observed jenny and zach and they seemed to be really cool kids and i hope i see them sometime soon, so we got off the bus, and we parted and i got into my moms car and thats almost the end. i took a shower, to clean myself of the previous two days, it was saddening because some of my memory was stained onto me in stench and it was very sad to see ti go down the drain like that. but anyways im here, and ive tired out my forearms typing this mass of consenates and vowels, periods and commas. so ill part this section of my enagural entry as this day was awesome, and i hope i get to see my good friend ben in the future, seriously hes awesome, and his girlfriend seems nice as hell. so yeh, cheers to you and remember when in doubt use the 2 block theory.


i like talking to ben and katie, they are some of my good friends that ive met downtown and at shows. i hope i get to know and hang out with them more, they are a display of fine human beings. i also need to paint hannahs house and take a piss. so im off. bye.

(thanks for wasting about 5-10 minutes of your life reading about my day)